The Story of the Anti-Upperclassmen strike

It seemed right to me, being heavily involved from the beginning, to write a story of the events on the night of the sping sing as they occured concerning me. This is taken from an IM conversation (all non-story parts removed), therefore is full of gross errors, and the result of top-speed typing, not careful reflection. You may note that a significant portion of the pre-operation information is missing; a lot of planning and teamwork went into this, but that will be told at another time. I promise it is completely accurate and no exaggeration appears anywehere within it.:)
       --brenton
PS: if you are in a rush, the most interesting part starts where the bold heading "the main assault" is. you might skip to there if you don't want to wade through my earlier wanderings.
February 13, 2003


the beginning

            Every year at the spring sing Kickoff the upperclassmen pelt the freshmen with waterbaloons. apparently they cordon off every exit, every path, and every possible way of getting down to the kickoff, and they utterly soak everyone--we found this out the day before--we were advised to wear get-wet-able clothes. we had different plans.
            New Scandinavia planned military actions to completely disarm the upperclassmen all over campus by the time the freshmen arrived.
            it started at 7:30 that night
            it went on for a long time since then untill 11--a long nivolved story, and every part of it an utter success.
            i only know the parts of the story that i was involved in (probably the most exciting anyway) so ill tell you that.

the beforehand sabotage party

            a small group of men from page left page around 7:45, after lots of battle planning and coordinating with our allies
            we were armed with a bag of water ballons each
            we first went up to everest, hoping to engage the enemy
            we saw nobody, but found a truck with a big trash bin in it
            it was full of water-ballons
            we de-activated them.
            then we went up to emmerson to try to get any other ballons they had up there, root through the lounges etc...
            they engaged us at the entrance.
            we fell back, and made a second advance, while i ran around back
            the advance failed, but i snuck in the back
            they were guarding the door to their dorm, and i walked nonchalantly in (excuse me)
            they stepped aside, (oh, sorry, we thought you were the enemy)
            i asked where their bathroom was, hoping to destroy their baloon production facilities
            the guy made a funny pause and said, "we don't have a bathroom" and darted into his bathroom
            i would have tried to force my way in, but there were lots in there, and they might have locked me in a room or something
            so i left, considering the battle lost
            as i ran away from armington, they noticed that i was a member of the very force they battled, and thought i had stolen their baloons. they began to chase me
            i ran down in front of the post office, jumped over the ledge, but somehow slipped, hit my knee hard on the rail, and lost my sense of up and down and time as i fell over the edge--i remember my knee hitting something hard, my hip, and then my front forehead hitting the ground hard,
            it took me a second to regain my senses, i looked for my baloons, they were all popped
            i had fallen at lease six feet and landed on my head
            i got up and ran through the bushes in to the kerwood lawn
            i decided to walk.. i could hear them still following me
            i no longer had the baloons so they had failed already.
            i heard them (they were horrible at being sneaky)
            "thats him, is that him. hold on , go that way"
            "should we bag him, wait follow him"
            i walked on, acting as if i knew nothing, listening to them rustle through the bushes behind and alongside me
            i walked to the study where my ally COle was eating, i knew
            i talked to him ,and then decided to spy, as my knee was severely hurting, i was limping, and my forehead was swollen, etc...
            apparently my persuers lost interest, and i hears cars start up in the DC lot--relocating baloons
            i saw some guys walking secretly down the main road, with army like gear
            so i watched and followed a bit
            they left campus--they were obviouly going down towards armington
            i did not know it at the time, but this was the Little ITaly force heading down to meet us
            anyway, i went down the other way to meet up with them at armington, and see what they were up to
            on the way i saw a jeep and other cars move down--one stopped at the observatory
            i saw them at the bottom sneaking around in the bushes, and i saw guys with bags of baloons coming out of armington
            now you must understand that the main part of our plan, based on inside information which said most of the waterbaloons would come out of armington C at about 8:00, was to hit them as they carried their baloons to theeir firing positions
            so i was thinking i might take them out, or they might take me out, as the story of our retaliation plan had been leaked and we knew they knew we were coming
            turns out that it was the team that i had been seperated from--they had discovered nothing at armington--not a single baloon
            i told them my info, and that there were four guys in the bushes over there, who knew we were here
            i thought we should attack them
            anyway, eventually two guys come walking down the road, and we are like man, are we about to be assaulted
            are they going to notice that we are here and is the whole operation going to be blown?
            but they were acting a little jittery, half-hiding behind a tree
            we watched them
            --there are two more still in the bushes, i said
            "hey, they are freshmen!"
            we walked over towards them, with our baloons, and they looked scared
            "hey, its you guys, hows it going!?"
            our forces united
            i suggested that we run by the observatory, as i knew there were baloons being transported there
            they decided not to
            (i had been having toruble controlling my forces--most of them recruits and not actual New Scandinavian military)
            so i left them agian, scouted out armington to make sure, and found that it was completely clean
            i walked up by the obsvty. and noticed several people walking behind it in the shadows and setting up camp--as well as two other vehicles parking and unloading by the time i had left
            i scouted around a bit more, but found nothing and returned to everest to rezendvous with my team
            they were there, and looking for a fight
            we saw some guys going up the bushes, and we had a brief engagement, untill they ran into their dorm and locked the doors
            we were really trying to figure out how to get to that bathroom, a distraction and a sabotage team, a full on strike...
            but we ended up just having a minor skirmishes, and a friendly chat with them
            we returned to Page
            we went up to page
           

the main assault

            did i mention that we had previously filled a bunch of baloons?
            we had at least 200--weak compared to their arsenal, but enough
            but ammassing in the section was all the guys on the original raids, (about 5) plus many others from our section, and practically the entire B section
            perhaps 20 or 25 in total personage
            and we were carrying room trash cans full of baloons, and bags of baloons, and baloons in hand
            we went argued for a while about what was going on
            it was about 8:40
            before most were leaving
            we went out, expeccting a barage from everest up the hill
            nothing came for a while, then a few baloons
            we thought of taking them out, but decided against it
            we continued on
            they were mobile, they followed us
            we took 'em on when they came close or threw stuff
            we pretty much held them back
            they were going to destroy us, but we just plowed through
            an unbeatable enthusiastic inpenatrable force
            nobody was yet hit

the upperclassmen's failed truck assault

            we walked down that steep part towards the physics building
            there is that big drop by the bookstore in front of where the textbooks were sold...
            and we noticed ahead of time that there was a truck loaded with loaded people in the back
            one or two peple snuck up and lobbed a few baloons into the bed--nailing 'em
            the truck, which was supposed to come out in suprise and plaster us moved out, and a veritable rain of baloons flew at them.
            they lobbed a few misguided baloons, but had to accelerate out of there rather quickly
            all the while enemy forces trying to follow us from all sides, being held at bay by our arsenal
            the hardest part was keeping ourselves from totally taking them out so we could save ammo
            we wnt down by the library, and towards the science building
            we knew they were going to be there
            and i hears someone say "no no, there will be a huge force there!" others knowingly nodded
            we encountered that force--they had a whole stockpile in the chemestry labs
            they tried to attack, but we held them at bay
            their baloons hit the cieling or missed, or fell short
            we threw a dang lot of baloons at 'em and they ran.
            the ground was still completely puddles when we came back by there
            as everyone ran around porter theatre

the first 'disarmament'

            and i ran alone into the chem building, hoping to find their reserves
            they had none, their mobility was their strength (and their undoing, as we shall find)
            anyway, by the time i emerged, i was a few steps behind the persuing upperclass force, them not noticing me a bit
            i saw then as i followed them down the stariwell that they were carrying trashbins of baloons
            therein lied the keys to their mobility, the same strategy we had been using
            anyway, i came out to the parking lot below the science building to see the upperclassmen engaged in a crossfire with the freshmen forces--i was right behind them
            they had two bins of baloons
            i tried to walk nonchalantly up to them so i could take out their supply
            but they noticed me ahead of time, one of them was eric, who recognised me and knew i was out to sabotage them. he moved towards me and alerted the others of my presence
            keep in mind that up to this point probably not one freshman had gotten wet
            i was very dry
            anyway, i made a run for the bin, was stopped by a wall, scrambled through, with them still on me, one was in front of the bin, keeping it from me
            somehow i managed to get it and overturn it and step on most of the baloons before they completely took me out
            i was soaked the very minute i began to run for it
            but they did not expect me to keep going
            they thought the water would ward me off
            anyway, they tackeled me into some nearby grass thankfully, and smashed me into the ground, gave me a full round of good hard baloons in the face, head, back, etc...
            then they let me go, and persued the other freshmen again
            i immediatly got up and grabbed their second bin
            overturning it and running, not bothering to pop all of the ballons
            now at this point we were cloe to the gym
            the freshmen force had retreated into the bushes up by the pond and around there
            the upperclasssmen were all over
            though afraid to go into the bushes for fear of soaking

the final battle--one versus two hundred

            down in front of the gym was a HUGE force of upperclassmen
            in front of the gym they had a full sized trash barrel full of baloons
            they also had about five of the smaller bins full of baloons
            the mobile teams still engaging in crossfire battles were refilling from there, and planned to destroy anyone who tried to enter they gym
            all around these bins was about 20 people within four feet
            and 30 more all over the courtyard
            and a group of observers at the side perhaps 20 strong
            i was standing more in the upperclassman front than the freshman front, having come in through their forces from the rear
            and they were all around me, but not really persuing me
            i walked into the shrubs to talk to my forces a bit... beaming at my double binned success
            but they seemed to not be doing much, so i walked back into enemy teritory
            still unchallenged ...
            and i still had the bin in my hand...
            so i walked towards their huge arsenal
            i walked right up to them and held my bin out
            they were mostly girls standing all aournd the bin, but still lots of guys
            i held my bin out
            and they began to fill it with baloons, just as i had hoped!
            so i waited untill it was full, forces flying all around me, activity and action, screams of pain and triumph from all sides
            at this time the fresmen had begun to advance towards the gym and teh stockpile up the steps between teh ttwo doors where i was currently 'refilling'
            i waited until my bin was full--rather quickly i might add to their credit
            and by then i had made my plans
            i overturned my bin, causing an instant outrage
            i then proceded to overturn as many of the other bins as i could
            i got two small ones, and then the big one
            they were trying to stop me
            grabbing me, pushing me back
            grabbing the bins
            i wrestled through and overturned all the others
            then , amidst yells of "pick them up! pick them up! i ran down the steps and began to pop as many as i could
            unbeknowedst to me, my RA dustin had followed me into the fray
            he began stepping on the baloons with me
            we utterly destroyed about a thousand baloons then and there
            their entire stockpile
            one guy tried to tackle me
            i was slightly bent over, and leaning forward and he jumped on me in a wrestling move that shold have totally grounded me
            but i was totally soaked (did i mention that once i dumped the bin i had just refilled i was steadily hit with baloons again?)
            anyway, i was so wet or something, that he just kind of slipped off and hit the ground hard
            i heard some 'ooh' s of approval and awe from a group of girls behind me... even i was impressed with myself there.
            anyway, i noticed one girl carrying the last bin
            i heard some 'ooh' s of approval and awe from a group of girls behind me... even i was impressed with myself there.
            anyway, i ran at her
            tried to get it, she turned away from me, and others tried to grab me, b ut i reached around her, one side, then the other,
            i grabbed it eventually overturning the contents
            that was the last of it, i stomped the baloons
            all that was left was anything they had in their hands--not much considering they had all thrown them at me

the story winds down

            by this time the freshman force was down on the gym patio
            it was pretty much over then
            minor baloon tradeoff took place, and both sides were out of ammo
            i had singlehandedly destroyed their entire arsenal
            i walked about them freely now, they had nothing to fear from me as i had nothing left to do
            i walked towards the aforementioned group of observers, mostly girls, upperclassmen, and raised my hands in trumpoh
            they had seen it and gave me approval, impressed
            they were there to watch their friends pelt the freshmen, instead they saw one man ruin all of their plans
            that was it; we had won
            other non-force freshmen began to arrive
            there was a strange line--the freshmen in one side, the upperclassmen on the other--each execting that the other still had something up its sleeve
            surely the upperclassmen had more baloons.... was this it?
            and the upperclassmen defeated, still afraid of the awesome power of the freshmen, assumed we were preparing a volley to make them write home about
            anyway, we cleared a line down to the gym, got them all to follow us, and took them out
            there was cheering and hooraying
            and i tried to tell them that they had nothing left, but the freshmen stayed back--im still not sure why, i guess the old batlte lines
            finally someone said, its time, if you are going to fight more do it, if not, go inside!!!!
            so we all went inside with much rejoicing
            we had utterly won
            not more than 5 freshmen got we
            t, i think
            our purpose was accomplished; we protected the freshmen from soaking, and we had utterly taken out their supplies, rendering them useless.
            the end
            and i didn't even tell you about all our great plans
            our political troubles
            the upperclassmen finding out
            the changes of plan
            the near insurrection at the time of deployment
            the betryal of our secrets by little italy to a 'confidant' girl in armington
            etc etc etc
            and of course, the kickoff we did, putting our hands all together and yelling boo-yah together
            an altogether glorious night where freshmen showed the upperclassmen that we were not to be pushed around, that we were a force to be reconed with
            that we were indeed smarter, stronger, and more organized than therm
            amen!
            okay, thats the end of the story
            its all fun and games until
            the freshmen get involved!!!!!!!!!!!!!
           
           
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